How Cupertino keeps iSheep in the Cult

Why the acolytes of the bitten fruit are the way they are

That whole, “Apple ‘makes’ or ‘builds’ devices that are fragile, non-user serviceable, overpriced status symbols that are shilled using big dollar marketing tactics that trick hapless iSheep with words like, ‘magic’:

That is not sarcasm.

Cupertino tricks people into paying exorbitant amounts of money for flattened, rounded-cornered, one-button rectangles that simpletons can operate while living their feckless hipster lifestyle devoid of anything too operationally challenging or technically complicated. Like how many times to press the – one – home button.

It’s all true. As soon as the announced the iPhone 7 and 7 plus, my iPhone 6 was slow, stupid and no longer adequate. And it bothers me to this very moment that I cannot buy an iPhone 7 anywhere.

Therefore, last week, I dropped my iPhone 6 on the concrete. I really did try to put it in my back pocket. Fortunately, I had an extra iPhone 6 laying around so I cannibalized the display. I happened to perform the repair on 360 video.

When the display replacement was complete (after having to disassemble the home button and carry it over on the display that wasn’t cracked), the cameras didn’t work, and the digitizer electrical connection flakey…I would have to twist the phone to reconnect the digitizer to the logic board. Since Apple can do a display repair for less than I can buy an authentic OEM repair assembly from iFixit after shipping costs…I gave Apple the responsibility to fix my phone…and in return I would make it rain $130.

Scratches all around….

It is disappointing that the i6 repair costs haven’t decreased now that we have completed 2 design spins since the i6.

This is the reason I tell people I will do the display fix at no charge: just buy the part you want, I’ll fix it.

So, there is your proof. Apple was going to be fine with taking more money from me…to fix a phone that I broke by dropping it. And when I told them that I took the phone apart – put it back together (except I didn’t really finish because I left the cable retaining plate off…they noticed that)…I showed them their skinny, round-corner rectangular invention and told them what they needed to do. They reminded me that the display was $129, but the replacement cost was going to be $400 if I caused ESD damage to the iPhone by, ‘doing it yourself’. If you watch the video, I brought my grounding strap but didn’t use it, didn’t turn off the phone before repairing it on top of a desk that did not have an ESD mat.

They fixed the handset, I paid them ~$140.

The past couple of days I realized there were still issues. The cameras didn’t work. The digitizer performance would degrade, and the screen would flicker. So I took it to iQue and I Asked to borrow a pentalobe driver so I could see if the Genius remembered to put the cable-cluster retention plate on the logic board connectors…because I gave the iPhone to them without one. It was there, but when I pressed the home button and then applied pressure to the retention plate (yes…I was touching electronics on a powered unit) the screen kicked on. So I went back to Apple to give them another opportunity.

Apple Store Station Park apologized for making me wait 2 hours after they checked the phone in, but they apologized to me for botching the repair. Then they said it wouldn’t have mattered if the repair had been done right because the camera sensor and digitizer connectors on the logic board were damaged.

I came to the Apple Store with:

  1. An out of Warranty iPhone
  2. An iPhone that I dropped and damaged
  3. No Apple Care
  4. An iPhone that I modified
  5. An iPhone without all the parts in it
  6. Knowing I wasn’t going to be able to buy an iPhone 7

I left with a new (refurbed) iPhone 6.

That is the, ‘magic’ or the, ‘trickery and marketing’ everyone is always talking about when it comes to what compels the iOS user to continue be a customer of the Cult in Cupertino.

If you really want to know why Apple does the things that it does…the financing, the training, the payment system services, the quality control, CustomerSat, focus on the User… I’m sure some of it had to do with making money by keeping their customers happy. Some of it has got to be the simple fact that it’s better for everyone if the iOS user gets serviced right the first time. Apple doesn’t like to have to rely on the competency…or lack thereof…of a trusted partner. Especially if Apple has the means in which to do it themselves.

Tired of your customers getting defrauded buying stuff on the Internet on their iPhone? Create Apple Pay

Tired of your customers complaining about shipping times? Book exclusive fight services years in advance. The volume rocker on the iPhone 3G, the audio jack in the iPhone 5, the mic-array on the iPhone 6 and this event are the 4 times I have been issued no-cost device replacements outside of warranty.

We always read about the stories where Apple didn’t give the wife of the deceased AppleID account user the password.

You never read about the person who walks out of the Apple Store with a cost-free replacement device every time he has had an issue.


Also published on Medium.

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